Writing again

.Hi everyone,


I stopped writing a while ago because I thought that it just hurt too much to write the words I felt. I've spent the last few months in sadness and pain because:

I'm losing my hair rapidly;
I am unable to find the understanding, compassion and empathy that I need to help ease my pain;
I have no one to talk to and therefore the pain just sits on my heart and drowns my spirit.

So I've decided that it hurts less to write.

 I'm still losing my hair. The mass shed started about November of last year. My texture just changed. While I thought it weird... I figured it would normalize soon.  I have AGA- androgenetic alopecia ( male pattern baldness) and for the last four years I have been in a battle to stop my hair loss and grow my hair back.  Some days were better than others but I was hanging in there.  I figured I would just deal with the different the different texture but keep my growth. It didn't happen.

In December I clarified my hair using a product I'd used several times before without incident. My hair tangled and matted so badly unlike anything id ever seen.  I was in shock. At the end of my hours long effort to undo the damage, my hair was dead. Limp, frayed , dead. Since then I have lost most of those strands. They just fall off of my head, daily.   I wracked my brain to find a answer... Ending nioxin? Too much omega 6? Flax seed oil? Stress?  I corrected all of the possibilities and still my hair falls from my head. I've  kept up my trims and protein and moisture treatments trying to save my hair but so far nothing has worked. I've lost half of my hair's thickness and  I went from one inch to bra strap length to shoulder length in two months.   The loss is still occurring. My doctor was no help...Turns out AGA not only gets your scalp hair but it shrivels your ends too.

It's June and my strand's texture is frayed and broken off on the entire right side and middle of my head. It's just past chin length in a straight line starting at my ear and ending at my nape. The hair is just gone.. I don't cry nearly as much as I want to but it hurts so very bad to see it. I try to keep it in a updo or pony tale so that no one sees. Going out is traumatic so I just try not to.

So I'll be back to updating my blog with my daily pain, efforts, regimen and any glimmer of hope that I have hit the bottom so I can start coming back. I grew my hair long despite AGA and it's been hard to accept  that it has ravaged my hair anyway.

Jkps